"When one is out of touch with oneself, one cannot touch others." Toward the end of the last century, when author and aviatorAnne Morrow Lindbergh wrote these words, she may have meant more than physical touch. But knowing how to soothe or celebrate ourselves can be key to our overall well-being—and doesn't need to depend on finding a friend or booking a massage.
1. Hug Yourself for Happiness
The benefits of a good hug are indisputable: reducing stress levels and blood pressure, improving mood and feelings of trust, even boosting immunity. Credit for much of the benefit goes to oxytocin, often called the “bonding” or “love” hormone, and 20 seconds is all it takes to trigger its release. So don’t hold back: show yourself a little love, and stretch out your shoulders at the same time, with a good arm wraparound. Your posture and stress levels will thank you.
2. Cross Your Arms to Relieve Pain
Crossing your arms across your midline (by hugging or just folding your arms) can help reduce physical pain. Research has shown that it confuses the brain just enough to impede pain signals. It also suggests a feeling of safety and self-compassion that reduces the nervous system's reactivity.
3. Try an Energy Medicine Practice to Reduce Tension
You may not have a specific pain, but shoulder tension is a common plague, especially for those of us who spend much of the day hunched over computers. Try this simple energy medicine exercise to move and diminish the energy that lodges there. It may also increase your balance and harmony as well as your ability to sense—and use—your body’s energy.
4. Give Yourself a Round of Applause
Applause has largely universal meaning; it's even morphed into an emoji that communicates our approval online. But clapping speaks to more than appreciation—it may also have health benefits. There are 39 acupressure points in our palms, and some yoga and Hindu traditions use clapping to help improve a range of physical conditions as well as a way to activate emotional and spiritual devotion.
5. Steady Your Heart
Self-compassion meditation teacher Kristin Neff offers this short practice: "Take two or three deep breaths. Gently place your hand over your heart, feeling the gentle pressure and warmth of your hand. If you wish, place both hands on your chest, noticing the difference between one and two hands. Feel the touch of your hand on your chest. If you wish, you could make small circles with your hand on your chest. Feel the natural rising and falling of your chest as you breathe in and as you breathe out. Linger with the feeling for as long as you like." And if you don't like the feel of your hand on your chest, she suggests cradling your cheek, stroking your arm, or holding one hand in the other in your lap.
6. Tap Anxiety Away
Clinical psychologist Laurel Parnell suggests this simple exercise to calm any anxiety you might be feeling. Imagine your favorite peaceful place—the beach, a mountain, your bedroom—and when you fully embody that image, begin to tap yourself bi-laterally. You can alternate right and left on your legs or cross your arms and tap on your shoulders, 6-12 times or for as long as it feels good.
7. Brush More Than Your Teeth
Your skin is your largest organ and brushing it with a soft, dry brush does more than just increase blood circulation, promote lymph health, and exfoliate. Dry brushing, as it's called, also has a feel-good effect on the nervous system. Try it anytime or make it part of your routine before you get into the shower. Warning: you may get hooked.
